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"It was purely sexual for him, mainly receiving oral, but because he was the first person who'd ever shown an interest in me, I fell in love,” says Simon, now in his late 20s. He would always tell me he wasn't like me, and couldn't be, because he 'had his whole future ahead of him'.
It depends how things play out, whether it’s out in the open or “our little secret”.Gay men aren't toys to be practised on.”Fluidity of any kind has been a difficult concept for the mainstream to get its head round – we really do love to pigeonhole – and it’s had a bad rap from people who don’t understand it.Bisexuality is historically as adventurous as many people’s imaginations would allow, and even then it’s either dismissed as “greed”, totally erased as a phase en route to a more established label – “fully gay” or “totally straight” usually the end result – or seen as a fetish, especially when it's straight guys gazing upon gay or bi women.What does it mean to put a label on your sexuality, to assign a category to your own existence? Does it result from your actions, or how you feel inside?There’s no denying labels can be very important, to help people forge a sense of identity in a world where they may feel more marginalised – every letter in the growing LGBTQIA alphabet has fought for and earned its place.
But just as labels can reassure, they can also confine or confuse, or seem like a restriction to those terrified of being defined by it for ever.